From Teammate to Team Lead: A Real Talk Guide to the Transition

New managers often get promoted to lead their former peers. In many ways this is great! You’ve got strong relationships with the team, know how to do the work, and have probably spent time considering how to improve things.

This can also make the transition more complicated. And kinda weird. Here are 3 questions we get asked a lot about managing peers:

What if someone else was vying for the role, and I'm now their manager?

Being aware of this dynamic is important. We recommend that you discuss what happened with your own manager. Ideally, your manager has already talked through the situation with your passed-over-peer.

While you might give your peer space to process, it's best to acknowledge the situation directly and kindly.

In a 1:1, you can say: “I wanted to label that my becoming your manager isn't easy. You're obviously super talented and I'm grateful I get to work with you. It may feel weird in the short-term, but I’m confident we can move forward and succeed as a team. What do you think?”. This gives them an opportunity to voice concerns and for you to validate them.

Remember: this situation doesn’t give the person an excuse to bring a poor attitude or poor performance to work. If you observe that kind of behavior, talk to your manager about it and address it quickly.

How am I supposed to tell my peers what to do?

It's best to imagine that you're a brand new leader coming onto a brand new team. Assume you know nothing.

Take your time and listen before taking a lot of action. If there's anything important that needs to change, be direct and share your “why”. For example, remove a meeting that is a waste of time.

Otherwise, get to know each team member and how they work. Run a start-stop-continue exercise (what should you start doing, what you put energy into continuing, and what should you stop doing) as a team or in each 1:1 to learn what’s working and what’s not. In this way, you’ll build trust and gain buy-in for changes you make.

Can I still be friends with my direct reports?

Sorry to say - not right now. Try to distance yourself from your direct reports socially. This means that outside of team events, it’s best not to hang out with team members.

You may be thinking - “No no, we’re different. We’re cool”. Trust us: things have changed. You are now responsible for how much your team member makes and how their performance gets rated. No matter how flat your org is, you are still in a position of power.

In future, once everyone is accustomed to the dynamic you may be able to spend social time with one another. Just be prepared for things to feel different (no one really relaxes with their boss around). And that’s OK.

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Keen for more support as a new manager? The Mintable is here to help - with cohort-based learning, practical tools, and a community of managers.

Want to support the soon-to-be and brand new managers in your company? We have a high-impact workshop made for your team - From IC to Manager: Nail the Transition.

Get in touch today to boost leadership confidence and capability.

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